Talismans

 i.
a childhood fear that seized me in the bath
as i laid back and swished my hair to feel like Ariel
the image of all the baby snakes 

pouring down on me from the shower head

or that a huge snake would emerge 

from the pipes of the toilet 
to bite my butt
I checked and checked again 
to be sure I was safe
and my brother curled over
in laughter
or the night camping in Maine
where in my fear of the dark 
I tried to think of things I love
words to focus on to blot out the scared
candy popped into my head
and before I could stop it next was
Candyman 
which I hadn’t seen 

but knew to be a scary movie
the image of the poster haunting me until sleep finally settled

ii. 
four gems in the pocket of skin tight jeans
a growing list of incantations and hand motions
for luck 
  to speed time 
      protection from pressure
I hand them to you 
like treats to fill your basket
to stave off the beasts of the forest
but what if the pain is in the deflection?
each fright vanquished 

only adding to the suspense of next time
we could trust fall into 
the tender
it’s right at the surface
skim the fat and savor the depth
it’s easy for you to say
you chanted this morning
and it is and it isn’t
I did my mom the favor
sank my worries out of reach
somber mornings spared of existential throbbing 
so this is progress, all the reels tell me
that it’s laid out in the open
but for me
it’s like the mother snake sliced
babies writhing and writhing
get the lunch packed
contend with me
contend with me
contend with me